Embracing Mystical Life: Part Two
Following Session 8: Embracing Mystical Life: Part Two
May 12, 2026 — June 9, 2026
Synthesis Statement
This session came as a bit of relief. The previous session left some unresolved tension for me as our homework was to explore what facilitates our journey away from Spirit. While I found a certain sense of peace in a natural expansion and exploration away from, that left a certain void, or responsibility on us to remember where we came from, intimately enough that we can hold it in a way as to preserve its value. And in truth, memories are fragile. They are easy to distort, to alter, even to fabricate. So, the practice and homework of Part One left a certain vulnerability, an openness to loss. Maybe that is part of the Witness, Grieve, Pray, Act that we have learned about.
But, enter Part Two, and we discussed a longing to return to the soul’s journey. “In the end, people tire of everything except heart’s desiring Soul’s Journey”. I don’t know whose quote that is, it was in our packet for this session, but I do find that true in my own life. I find less and less of the mundane existentially interesting. Sure, I can dive in for play, for fun, momentarily. But I know this or that will not quench the depth of my hunger.
Embracing Mystical Life: Part Two taught that the soul awakening back to the journey of return is an act of grace. Spirit calls us and we can choose to respond or not. There are four ways to remember this engagement with Soul & Spirit:
Way of Remembrance - remembering we come from (and somehow forgot) our source. Then we can begin to return.
Way of Descent - In order to return, our ego must diminish/get out of our way, which is frightening for the ego thus it resists.
Way of Community - Community is richly supportive as it is in the presence of others, and working with and for others that we start putting others before ourselves. This is a way past ego, and an act of self-negation. It is also an act of accountability. Living for community helps keep a bigger picture, a bigger orientation in mind.
Way of Oneness - Along the way, we eventually discover our path of walking towards a path of Spirit becomes walking with Spirit. Through that connection, we recognize that we are part of that living oneness.
We were given practices across each of these ‘Ways’ to deepen our engagement and understanding, to enrich our practices, and ultimately, to help us further be able to stand as space, allowing what is divine to work in and through us, and to enter the world.
Report on Practice
I have been wrestling with the intersection of two insights we have encountered in this program:
On the one hand, we have: Trust in God, but tie your camel - an old Islamic/Sufi proverb teaching a healthy balance between faith and human responsibility. When I think of this, I think about doing what is in my control, my circle of influence, in order to help increase the likelihood of my desired outcome. I prefer for my camel to be here when I get back, thus, it’s better that I tie it to the post.
On the other hand, in the Way of Descent, a plea we are offered to recite as a way to move ourselves closer to Spirit, and a mantra we discussed earlier in the program: I do not ask to see; I do not ask to know; I ask only to be used. This is a way of allowing our ego to get out of our way, and to align ourselves with the will of God/Spirit/Creator.
I am somewhat comfortable holding either of these independently. I struggle to hold them together. No, I don’t need to know 100% that the camel is going to be there when I get back. But I need to reasonably have some sense that it will, or that I will want that camel later to decide to tie it up in the first place.
For years, I have somewhat struggled with my vocation. I have always wanted to give the majority of my time to work that helps humanity and/or the planet (I do believe these are interlinked so helping one helps the other). The company I founded decades ago, Our Olive Branch, has that name for exactly that purpose - a peace offering to the world. Of course, in starting my career, in starting my professional life, I needed to be sure my camel was tied to the post, so I was somewhat agnostic about what clients I served. I turned down some companies that I felt had a negative impact on the world, but others that seemed neutrally participating in commercial society, I onboarded. I thought may have been able to help people within those organizations in meaningful ways. And I have. But that still left me feeling like I wanted more. I wanted to help in more directly impactful ways.
Eventually, I decided to get more involved in public service. The pull had been with me for years, though I had never found the right opening. It so happened that after my daughter died, and after there were some political changes at the national level that I found distressing, I was looking for more meaning in my life and also felt the need to engage politically rather than sit at home being upset about what I was seeing. Not long thereafter, a seat on our City Council was vacated. Several people encouraged me to apply. It was a thorough interview process and there were a total of six applicants. In the end, I won the appointment. Later that year, I was elected to remain on our City Council for a full term. This work proved to be qualitatively more aligned with what felt like what I wanted from my vocation. I don’t know if that is the nature of the council work - the way that sort of work container operates, or, on the other hand, the type of clients I have had, or the type of work I have done for those clients, in the past.
All that said, I have been thinking and meditating this period about the Way of Community, and how working with and for community helps support “self-negation”, accountability, and for me, working for the greater good. So, I then cannot help but wonder, do I lean more deeply into finding public sector work - not only as a vocation but also as a spiritual practice? Would a larger scale diminish my connection or expand it? If I were to onboard more clients with this more community-centered/mission-driven focus, would that be enough to satisfy my craving? My hunger to return to Spirit? To walk with Spirit as part of my vocation?
While I wrestle with the idea of an office with greater impact, larger influence, and if I would be able to serve as well there as I do in my City, and if I would find it as satisfying, as soul nurturing, etc, I also have found another opportunity before me. A different path. One that is a bit more quiet. One that allows me to work more directly with individuals and help them gain their spiritual footing in a world of chaos. To grow as people, as leaders, and help bring forth a better future. This is a very different container than public office, but is also deeply in service of the whole. And, I am also called to write. I am inspired to sit, as I am now, and put words on ‘paper’. This too nurtures me, and I occasionally get powerful feedback that it nurtures others as well.
Each of these ‘vocations’ are different, and some of them are potentially mutually exclusive. This creates the tension. I can resonate with all of them. I feel in some way like I should know down which path to walk. All of these, to me, somewhat call for a “need to see”; a “need to know”. Again, I know things may work out differently than I may think, but I feel like I “need to know” which direction to walk in order to tie my camel. And not needing to see, and not needing to know, and asking only to be used, feels a little like I have to take my camel everywhere I go, all the time; and that is a bit of a burden. I am still discovering how to hold all of the above, together.
My deeper sense, whether I like it or not, is that at this moment, now, in the present, there really is not a decision to make. My ego yearns for the resolution, the ‘need to see/know’ because it will feel better, more in control. But that is all projection and fantasy. Today, I have the practice that I have. I can deepen it in the ways that are available to me today. I can contemplate and explore other elected or public service work that may be available, but I don’t have any specific doors to walk through at this moment anyway. So I can relax back into this moment and allow what will come as I continue to walk my path. As I stand as space.
The truth is, the future holds an infinite field of possibilities, as I think Deepak Chopra once called it. My job is to be present in this moment, and allow myself to be open to what is my highest and best use.
Connecting With Nature
Part of our homework was to spend time in nature. Touch the Earth, and allow ourselves to be touched by the Earth. This sounds pretty basic. Yet, for some reason I struggled here. I did go out and sit in our yard a few times. I took my shoes off and tried to ground myself better. I wanted to work in the yard but somewhat found myself short-circuiting. Sort of like a gardening version of writer's block. I would get outside, not know what to do with myself, and just sort of be stuck.
Part of my issue is my wife changed the face of our yard last year. She planted many new plants in different places. Now I don’t know when I am looking at a plant that needs care or a weed that should be pulled. I don’t know where there is space to plant something new, or if there are other bulbs underground already soon to emerge, or maybe intentionally empty. My wife does not love when I ask a bunch of questions or ask for directions about what to do, as she does not like to delegate, so the yard has somewhat become entry level prohibitive for me to engage with.
My other issue is my vestibular issues. It is easy to set off my symptoms. Lots of bending, lifting, carrying, etc. can set off my system in a way that requires hours of recovery time. So that inhibits my engagement as well. So, I have to find ways to keep the interaction within a safe vestibular zone, not ask my wife for directions, and know what is doable. It just seems to be a lot to figure out when I just want some simple, natural interaction. Even in the yard, life has gotten so complicated lately.
Reminders of the Power of Nature
All of that said, I had a call with a friend where we talked about connection with the divine, or a lack thereof. We talked about whether that descriptor is God, Spirit, the Divine, Nature, Love, Creation, Source. We talked about how Buddhism does not even care if you have a god to pray to. It is more about maintaining the right orientation of being present, which will give you what you need (which some will argue is that connection with God). Buddhism does not feel the need to name it - that is beside the point. I mentioned Steve Hagen's book, Buddhism Plain and Simple, as a way into that orientation.
I also shared a bit about Internal Family Systems as a way to drop internal conflict, and how a monk, Genpo Roshi, used a similar practice for a guided meditation to lead people to 'Big Mind'. By walking through different parts of the self, the damaged self, the controller, the seeker, the ego can get out of the way and we can connect to and experience Big Mind, the awareness that is larger than ego, and often can be felt with no boundary.
Then I recalled that she had mentioned loving being in her garden. I asked if she ever sees or resonates with the majesty, the grace, behind the plants, the flowers, the trees. She said yes. I suggested that when she goes out there, she could start by appreciating that, and then try to realize that she is made of the same energy, from the same creative force as all of that. Then she could try to let the boundary she feels at the ends of her body dissipate. Let herself be one with the garden. Be Big Mind in her garden. This is a practice I have done before, when looking out across a valley, at wondrous trees and taking in nature.
That conversation helped me realize something about my own experience. I often felt those kinds of connections when I was out in nature. They seemed more likely to spontaneously arise when I was in a place surrounded by natural beauty. I can recall pretty clearly when I was reading books on mindfulness, for example, that I would often look up from the page and feel as one with the world around me. Totally present with the nature surrounding me. But I had that experience more frequently when reading outside on my back deck in my yard than in my office. Same book, different space. That was a really interesting realization to me for a few reasons. I don't have answers to these questions, but the realization gave rise to these, which do point in certain directions.
Why did I experience these connections more often in nature than not in nature?
Was this program pointing at spending time with the Earth and nature for the same reason that I tended to experience that connection in that way?
Is it our common bond with all of nature and the ground of creation that allows us to slip into harmony with nature more easily when we are together with nature rather than in a space that is separated from it?
If our society did move to put connection with nature as a primary value, how would that reshape our collective experience?
Recalling & Collecting Threads of Divine Love
I also spent time gathering private memories of grace, synchronicity, awe, and connection - “threads of Divine Love” that have appeared throughout my life. I won’t list them all here, but the practice itself was meaningful. It reminded me that the return to Spirit is not only future-facing. It also involves remembering that Spirit has been present all along.
If this reflection has been of value, you’re welcome to support the time and care that go into this work.
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